Monarch Video, 1996
starring: Ernest Borgnine, George Milan, and Bunny Summers
written and directed by: Kenneth J. Berton

the plot: During a power outage, a kindly old grandfather (Borgnine) tells his young grandson a bedtime story. It’s about the ancient wizard Merlin (Milan) and his charming wife Zurella (Summers), who have arrived in the late 20th century to set up a shop in California. The purpose of the business, Merlin explains, is to reawaken humankind’s belief in magic, which has become dormant under people’s devotion to technology. When a skeptical newspaper columnist shows up at the shop looking for a juicy story, Merlin lends him a book of spells. The reporter takes it home and begins tampering with the spells—to disastrous consequences. An experiment on his cat spurs the animal to viciously attack him, and he ages several decades in a matter of minutes. But that’s not the end of the havoc Merlin’s merchandise triggers. Later, a thief breaks into the shop and steals a toy monkey, which he then sells to a novelty shop. It’s purchased by a woman who gives it to her son as a birthday present. As it turns out, the monkey is possessed by a wicked demon, which promptly begins killing the house plants and family pets with each crash of its mechanized cymbals. While Merlin bumbles around town searching for his lost toy, the boy’s father desperately grapples to save his family from the evil monkey.

why it’s good: “Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders” presents an enigma, of sorts. Glancing at the cartoonish cover art, and seeing jolly-ol’ Ernest Borgnine merrily telling a bedtime story, you’d think this was a children’s fantasy film. But you’d begin to have second thoughts when you saw a domestic cat bloodily maul a grown man, who proceeds to torch the cat alive by breathing fire in its face. For horror fans, it’s this first segment of the movie that holds the most appeal. Although the acting is atrocious, it’s fun to watch the outrageously arrogant reporter go mad with the power bestowed by Merlin’s book, only to have it bite him in the ass with little cat fangs. The second half of the movie lags immensely by comparison. A possessed monkey doll nefariously killing plants and goldfish just isn’t all that scary, and as it turns out, you only have to block his little cymbals from connecting in order to halt the evildoings. Nevertheless, it would appear Kenneth J. Berton felt his work was done after “Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders,” because it’s the only film he’s ever written or directed other than “The Devil’s Gift,” which is essentially the same as the second half of “Merlin’s Shop.”

why you should own it: “Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders” was available at a bargain from the Movie Scene in Portsmouth, which is going out of business and unloading all its remaining stock at discount prices. Not surprisingly, “Merlin’s Shop” was one of the last remaining films on the shelf. The first half is maybe worth watching. Otherwise, you might be better off seeing “Mystery Science Theatre 3000” lampoon the film. The robot critics have a blast analyzing the paradoxical contrast between the movie’s child-friendly presentation and its mildly gory content.